Parenting Highlight (Not)
Ah, the perfect storm: sleep deprived, stressed, PMSing, and an overly-squirmy 5 year old built entirely (at least it felt like) out of knees and elbows crawling all over you.
I did not realize how close I was to my limit until *snap!* I totally lost it last night. I'd been trying to watch a movie with Mags last night ("Who is that? Is he the bad guy? Is Harry going to get hurt? Is she dead? Are those spiders real? Can I have more milk? Will you get me a snack?") while she crawled all over me. Constant. Nonstop. Talking. And Movement. I had taken a small pad of paper away from her when it was time to go upstairs, and she lunged bak at me to get it, smacking my chin with herforhead in the process. Getting smacked in the face is bad enough, but combine that with a day of being climbed over AND a screw in my chin from the surgery that has not healed yet, and well, you get
Reflexively I smacked Mags on the forhead with the paper.
She stared at me with shock and horror before bursting in to tears. I nearly rolled my eyes out of my head before starting to comfort her. Oh, and then the guilt started.
"You (sob) you HIT ME!"
"You're right, Mags, I should not have done that."
"Mamas (hiccup) DON'T HIT!"
"Sweetheart, I'm sorry."
"I didn't bonk you on PURPOSE! (sob, sob)"
"I know, honey, I know."
Oh, and here's the best part. She whipped out the Golden Rule (or a preschool variation thereof,) and used it against me!
"When someone does something bad to you, (sniffle) you're not supposed to do something bad back!" And then she promptly hacked a fine mist all over my face, lightly sprinkling droplets of her germy cold all over my glasses and mucus membranes, I'm sure.
Guilt AND germs. I ground my teeth together. I utterly fucking hate being a parent sometimes.
Lucky for her she was awfully cute the rest of the night after we talked for a bit (although I'm not sure 'talking' wasn't me groveling a little bit in delerium just to get her to SHUT UP.) Oh, and she was up way too late because I just didn't have the energy to nag her into bed at the appropriate time. A slippery slope that is. Gotta get this sleep thing under control or she'll really walk all over me.