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Holyfuskingshit I am going to strangle my daughter. I have been trying to get her to go to sleep for an hour and a half now, and still she is awake. at least she's FINALLY STOPPED SCREAMING, which is a big plus. So far, our evening has gone something like this:

me in bed with Mags: Ok, we've read 2 Dora stories, now let's snuggle and go to sleep.
Mags: I want my sippy cup.
I hand her said cup: Here you go, love.
Mags takes a swig: This juice is spicy (just brushed her teeth.)
me: do you want some water?
Mags: No, milk.
I lie through my teeth: We're out of milk, but you can have some water.
Mags: Ok.
Dump out juice, get water, crawl back into bed.
Mags takes a few sips: I want juice.
me (tired, and not gonna refill that f***ing cup 14 times): Uhh, we're gonna have water now.
Mags: Spicy juice? Spicy juice? I want spicy juice!
me: Look, hon, when you said no juice, I dumped it out and now it's all gone.
Mags: SPICY JUICE?! SPICY JUICE?!
me: We can ahve some water, hon.
Insert freakout meltdown of the ages here; 20 minutes worth. Mags eventually calms down.
Mags: I want to snuh-huh-huggle (sniffle)
Insert 10 minutes of quiet snuggling.
me: Ok, I'm gonna go in the living room now and do some work. Get some good sleep, ok?
Mags: Snuggle? SNUGGLE?!
me: It's time for mama to go do some work.
Mags: SNUGGLE?! SNUGGLE?!?!
Another screaming fit.
me (teeth grinding together): Ok, I love you, but I need to go.
Escape to office. Howls of the damned can be heard from 3 rooms away.
13 year old brother enters: Hey, Mags is crying. It doesn't sound like she's gonna stop either.
Enter step-mother: Did you know Mags is crying? I think she wants you.
me (twitching): YesIknowbutIneedabreakbeforeIstrangleher,sorry.
Screams escalate. I stomp back to the bedroom.
father (in hallway): Don't forget to smile!
me, donning calm parenting voice: What's going on, Mags?
Mags: I want to snuggle.
me:

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agr. be right back.